While attending a party with a man I’ve been dating someone offered me a glass of wine. I considered what I had already had to drink and bit my lip hesitantly. “Oh….I really shouldn’t.”
“If you want it you should take it,” my date said kindly, “I’ll take care of you.”
When he said those last words I was hit by two unexpected emotions. One was a sense of warmth and affection for this man (who I trust implicitly) who so quickly offered to take care of me. The other was a sense of self-directed anger for wanting to be taken care of.
In my family independence is one of the most valued characteristic a person can have. If you study my family tree you will discover a long line of strong and forceful women. They ran (and run) the show. That’s not to say that the men in my family aren’t important or encouraged to be successful but ours has always been a very matriarchal system. No one ever told me I had to model my relationships after those held by my mother and grandmother (and great-grandmother) but there was an unspoken message that permeated almost every aspect of my upbringing: independence is strength and traditional female roles have little to no place in this family.
I have always had mixed feelings about that message. I like taking care of myself and I like being in control but I’m also attracted to the idea of being able to occasionally relinquish some of that control to somebody else. These somewhat inconsistent desires have gotten me into trouble in the past. Take my relationship with my ex-husband for instance. My ex has always been extremely good at reading people and while he didn’t always respect my conflicting emotions he definitely picked up on them, understood them and used them to his advantage on more than one occasion. I remember a phone conversation that we shared a few weeks before he proposed. We had been talking about the future and various potential job opportunities when he paused and then in an extremely careful tone that spoke to his awareness of the importance of his wording said, “I will always support you in your career ambitions and personal goals and I know you are more than capable of achieving them, but I want you to know that I will make sure to always be in a position to take care of you should you ever want or need me to.”
Right then and there I knew I would marry him. The fact that he was saying this to me after spending the last few months subtly pressuring me to transfer from the school of my dreams to a university that was closer to him was not lost on me; but the rhetoric was so beautiful and so perfectly in sync with what I wanted that I was sure it meant he was my basherte (that's Jewish for soulmate).
As it turns out my ex-husband did not follow through with any of those promises. Those of you who have been following this blog have an idea of what I’m talking about. For those of you who are visiting this site for the first time I’ll just say that as it turns out my ex had a plethora of emotional and psychiatric issues that made it impossible for him to take care of himself, let alone anyone else.
When I left that marriage I didn’t spend a lot of time wallowing in depression. I had learned my lesson: there is only one person in the world who is responsible for taking care of me and that’s me. My mother is still basically the matriarch within the family but I’ve accepted the fact that when she goes (which hopefully won’t be for a very long time) I will take over that position. My son will be able to count on me to take charge when need be and I will not pawn my family duties off on anyone else no matter how I might feel about them romantically.
So why did I get all warm, fuzzy and freaked by my date’s statement? After all it’s not like he was offering to support me in the manner that I’d like to become accustom to. He was just saying that if I should choose to drink myself into unconsciousness he’d make sure I crashed somewhere that wouldn’t lead to severe back-pain or sexual assault. If you think about it that’s not exactly a huge life-altering commitment on his part. The problem is that while my divorce made me stronger in many ways it did not wipe out the emotional needs and desires that made me vulnerable to my ex-husband’s charms. And that is a difficult pill to swallow.
But maybe this pill isn’t so much a prescription drug as it is a really big vitamin. Once I get it down it’s bound to make me healthier and it has a low risk of side effects. I’m always going to be an independent person. I will never sacrifice my dreams for the sake of a relationship. That’s not the kind of role model I want to be for my son and to be honest it’s just not who I am. But every once in a while I’m going to allow someone else to take care of me and I’m not going to berate myself just because I like it when a man makes me feel safe.
I’m not sure if that makes me more or less liberated. It’s just how I feel and I’m learning to be okay with that.
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
Friday, July 29, 2005
Monday, July 25, 2005
The Bizarre Wonders Of The Internet
This weekend I received an email from a woman whose book club has chosen Sex, Murder And A Double Latte to read. She is in charge of coming up with discussion questions and wanted to know if there were any currently available on the internet (she hadn’t found any). In the interest of helping her out I went ahead and Googled my name to see is anything useful would come up.
What came up was 8,700 sites.
My first thought was that there must be a lot more Kyra Davis’ out there then I realized. So I started flipping through the search pages and sure enough I found that there are a few sites that have information about other Kyra Davis’…but this was only the case for approximately 10 out of every hundred results.
Just a few weeks ago a friend of mine told me that one of the lessons they teach people in AA is that “what other people think of you is none of your business.” I may be paraphrasing but I remember the underlying message: it's only what you think of yourself that matters.
It's that kind of philosophical outlook that will always prevent me from becoming a recovering alcoholic. I want to know what other people think of me, particularly if they're posting those thoughts on the internet. So I immediately started perusing the websites in which I am somehow featured. While doing so I found a recent reference to myself on Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez's Sucias message board. Well I had to know what the Sucias were saying so I clicked it. Apparently a few people there saw me on The Look for Less and thought that I was “f#%king fab.”
I have to say that I am very flattered by that. I was hoping that I would come across well and was even harboring the dream that a few viewers might think that I was fab. But f#%king fab? With both a # and a %? Well that’s just f#%king spectacular!
And then there’s my Amazon and Barnes & Noble ranking that dramatically improved right after the airing of the show. And to top it all off I have a wonderful new outfit sitting in my closet that I can wear anytime I want! So basically I’m having one of those somebody-pinch-me-moments.
But back to the Google search. Most of the results were online reviews, online retailers and inventory information from libraries across the country. But there’s some other random stuff too. Like there’s this site that lists all these different author’s birthdays and sure enough I made their calendar (how do people find this stuff out?). Then there’s the sites that repost my blogs and discuss them or the people who have briefly met me or exchanged an email with me and then chose to write about it. Everything I’ve read so far has been very complimentary…almost too much so. Don’t get me wrong, I want people to like me and if I managed to entertain them or help them in some way I’m glad but after I finished reading statements on various sites that referred to me as being “amazing,” “Incredible,” and/or “a goddess” I took a moment to study my home (which I haven’t really cleaned since the last eclipse), my son (who is currently missing an eyebrow due to a little run in he had with his grandfather’s electric razor), and the chocolate ice cream sundae that I whipped together in a PMS frenzy and I wondered if “goddess” wasn't too strong a word.
Nonetheless I’m touched by everyone’s kind words. I never did find the discussion questions for the book club but that doesn’t mean they aren’t floating around the web somewhere. I stopped checking out “Kyra” sites after I got to the fifteenth page of the Google search. I may not be Athena or Aphrodite but I’m not the female version of Narcissus either.
I’ll try to come up with a few discussion questions and post them
here later this week.
‘til next time!
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
What came up was 8,700 sites.
My first thought was that there must be a lot more Kyra Davis’ out there then I realized. So I started flipping through the search pages and sure enough I found that there are a few sites that have information about other Kyra Davis’…but this was only the case for approximately 10 out of every hundred results.
Just a few weeks ago a friend of mine told me that one of the lessons they teach people in AA is that “what other people think of you is none of your business.” I may be paraphrasing but I remember the underlying message: it's only what you think of yourself that matters.
It's that kind of philosophical outlook that will always prevent me from becoming a recovering alcoholic. I want to know what other people think of me, particularly if they're posting those thoughts on the internet. So I immediately started perusing the websites in which I am somehow featured. While doing so I found a recent reference to myself on Alisa Valdes-Rodriguez's Sucias message board. Well I had to know what the Sucias were saying so I clicked it. Apparently a few people there saw me on The Look for Less and thought that I was “f#%king fab.”
I have to say that I am very flattered by that. I was hoping that I would come across well and was even harboring the dream that a few viewers might think that I was fab. But f#%king fab? With both a # and a %? Well that’s just f#%king spectacular!
And then there’s my Amazon and Barnes & Noble ranking that dramatically improved right after the airing of the show. And to top it all off I have a wonderful new outfit sitting in my closet that I can wear anytime I want! So basically I’m having one of those somebody-pinch-me-moments.
But back to the Google search. Most of the results were online reviews, online retailers and inventory information from libraries across the country. But there’s some other random stuff too. Like there’s this site that lists all these different author’s birthdays and sure enough I made their calendar (how do people find this stuff out?). Then there’s the sites that repost my blogs and discuss them or the people who have briefly met me or exchanged an email with me and then chose to write about it. Everything I’ve read so far has been very complimentary…almost too much so. Don’t get me wrong, I want people to like me and if I managed to entertain them or help them in some way I’m glad but after I finished reading statements on various sites that referred to me as being “amazing,” “Incredible,” and/or “a goddess” I took a moment to study my home (which I haven’t really cleaned since the last eclipse), my son (who is currently missing an eyebrow due to a little run in he had with his grandfather’s electric razor), and the chocolate ice cream sundae that I whipped together in a PMS frenzy and I wondered if “goddess” wasn't too strong a word.
Nonetheless I’m touched by everyone’s kind words. I never did find the discussion questions for the book club but that doesn’t mean they aren’t floating around the web somewhere. I stopped checking out “Kyra” sites after I got to the fifteenth page of the Google search. I may not be Athena or Aphrodite but I’m not the female version of Narcissus either.
I’ll try to come up with a few discussion questions and post them
here later this week.
‘til next time!
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
Thursday, July 21, 2005
The Joys Of Shopping
I don’t have a lot of time but I wanted to let you all know about a couple of things. One is that Fashionbliss.com the very chic and socially correct shopping site has been re-launched and it’s better than ever. Those of you who have been following my blog know that I am a close friend of Mika, the founder and CEO of the company and that she created this wonderful business after she lost her mother to breast cancer. Whenever you buy something from Fashionbliss a portion of the proceeds goes toward the fight against breast cancer. I can not tell you how proud I am of my friend. Plus I have to say that I’m rather excited about the items she has available on her website…I mean Prada handbags for under $200? Seriously check it out. I just finished my shopping and then went on to create a wish list. I love wish lists. Filling them out is like registering for your wedding without the impending messiness of marriage to worry about. If you are going to shop use code FRESHF33 for free domestic ground shipping and FAF2005 for 15% Off the total of one purchase.
Now for other news….most of you know I was a guest on The Look For Less. That show will be on at 8:00 on Sunday night on the Style network. I’m never nervous while being filmed but to be honest I hate watching myself later so you all are going to have to tell me how I did.
More later!
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
Now for other news….most of you know I was a guest on The Look For Less. That show will be on at 8:00 on Sunday night on the Style network. I’m never nervous while being filmed but to be honest I hate watching myself later so you all are going to have to tell me how I did.
More later!
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
Sunday, July 17, 2005
How Parenthood Has Inspired Me
Okay so enough with the heart felt advice and altruistic junk, let’s get back to me and my career. I’ve been reviewed in the August Issue of Ebony so let’s all do a happy dance about that one. In addition to that I’m going to be/have been interviewed by a few more Bay Area publications and the articles will be published within the next month or two. One of those publications is a parenting magazine of sorts and among other things they asked me how being a mom has influenced my writing. I am one of three women who will be featured in this article and from looking at the work of these other interview subjects my guess is that they are going to answer that question by saying that being a parent has made them more empathetic, caring and observant people and that is reflected in their writing—or something poignant like that. Unfortunately I can’t really say the same thing. It’s not that being a parent hasn’t changed me, of course it has. But I think it’s hard to read my book and see evidence of those changes. The odd thing is that Sophie’s disinterest in becoming a parent was directly inspired by my being a parent. Allow me to explain.
I love being a mom. There are times when I look at my son and am literally overcome with feelings of love and affection. As excited as I was to be reviewed in Cosmo, Ebony and the like I was equally excited when I saw my son ride his bike without the training wheels. However that doesn’t mean that there aren’t times when I long for the days when I could schedule a brow waxing without first checking the availability of a babysitter. One of my best friends is about to have her second child which she is thrilled about. Yet when we talk on the phone we constantly reminisce about the time when we went to Berkeley to see Nirvana in concert (Lenny Kravitz opened). Or there was the time when we were driving to Ocean Beach and then at the last minute changed our minds and kept driving down Highway One until we reached San Luis Obispo (a mere 5 hours later) and partied all night with a couple of Eddie Vedder look-a-likes that we picked up at some random bar. No question about it, those were fun times. It is because I miss those years that I have chosen not to give Sophie children. She can accept a last minute invitation to a gallery opening without a second thought. She can tootle around North Beach and Telegraph Hill all day without once asking the person by her side if he needs to use the potty. I live vicariously through her and delight in her free, unencumbered existence. And then when I’m done writing I return to my son and I’m filled with those darned feeling of love again. I live a double life and I love every moment of it—well okay, I don’t love it as much when I’m in my third edit checking for missing commas or when I’m trying to brush my son’s teeth while he’s having a melt down, but 85% of the time I’m pretty happy.
So has being a highly involved mom influenced my writing? Absolutely. It’s inspired me to write about a protagonist who is determined to remain childless. That probably doesn’t sound very maternal but for me it works.
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
I love being a mom. There are times when I look at my son and am literally overcome with feelings of love and affection. As excited as I was to be reviewed in Cosmo, Ebony and the like I was equally excited when I saw my son ride his bike without the training wheels. However that doesn’t mean that there aren’t times when I long for the days when I could schedule a brow waxing without first checking the availability of a babysitter. One of my best friends is about to have her second child which she is thrilled about. Yet when we talk on the phone we constantly reminisce about the time when we went to Berkeley to see Nirvana in concert (Lenny Kravitz opened). Or there was the time when we were driving to Ocean Beach and then at the last minute changed our minds and kept driving down Highway One until we reached San Luis Obispo (a mere 5 hours later) and partied all night with a couple of Eddie Vedder look-a-likes that we picked up at some random bar. No question about it, those were fun times. It is because I miss those years that I have chosen not to give Sophie children. She can accept a last minute invitation to a gallery opening without a second thought. She can tootle around North Beach and Telegraph Hill all day without once asking the person by her side if he needs to use the potty. I live vicariously through her and delight in her free, unencumbered existence. And then when I’m done writing I return to my son and I’m filled with those darned feeling of love again. I live a double life and I love every moment of it—well okay, I don’t love it as much when I’m in my third edit checking for missing commas or when I’m trying to brush my son’s teeth while he’s having a melt down, but 85% of the time I’m pretty happy.
So has being a highly involved mom influenced my writing? Absolutely. It’s inspired me to write about a protagonist who is determined to remain childless. That probably doesn’t sound very maternal but for me it works.
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
Thursday, July 14, 2005
A Word From Alesia Holliday
While others have hosted me on their blogs I have yet to host anyone else. Well that all changes today. Alesia Holliday is the fabulous author of American Idle, Super What? And most recently Nice Girls Finish First. Below you will find her take on the whole “nice girl myth.” Enjoy!
NICE GIRLS FINISH FIRST
So one day I was thinking about today’s woman, as I often do, considering that I write funny books about the everyday (and not so everyday!) things we all go through, and I was wondering about that perpetual dilemma – the Myth of the Nice Girl.
Somehow, through a peculiar evolution of the professional environment, women today are finally recognized (mostly) as equally competent, ambitious, and dedicated as men in the workforce. (We’ll leave the “we have to work smarter and harder” argument aside for now.) But yet, we have an added burden: we have to be NICE.
Now, this isn’t really tough for most women, most of the time. We were raised to be nice. That’s what little girls do, right? “Play nice!” “Be nice!” Except, well, there are times when you can’t be all that nice . . . Boyfriend cheating? Kick him to the curb! Um, in a nice way? Opposing counsel trying underhanded tactics? Notify the judge and get him sanctioned! Er, nicely?
The idea of a character who is very ambitious and a great person, but a little bit of a tough chick on the surface, really intrigued me. And I had the perfect character in Kirby Green, newly-hired exec at the Whips and Lace Co. She’d pretty much stolen every scene she was in in AMERICAN IDLE (Double RITA finalist, how cool is that??). Then I wanted to compare and contrast Kirby with a character who was so nice that she was in danger of becoming a doormat. Brianna sprang to life. My good friend who is an opera singer (no, really!) provided some great background for her. Then I set the two of them loose to play on the pages – each helping the other learn something about life, and about herself. That’s how NICE GIRLS FINISH FIRST was born.
Can we be successful as women today and still retain some of that niceness that was so valued in earlier years? I think so. But nice doesn’t mean dumb, and today’s nice girls DO finish first. They might just have to kick a little ass along the way.
Nicely.
Thanks for helping me celebrate the release of my second novel!! – Alesia Holliday (p.s. This nice girl is frantically polishing some pages due to Hollywood interest – you can see the details at http://www.alesiaholliday.com/blog/)
Let's hear it for Aleisa Holliday! Tune in Sunday for my next blog. In the meantime be nice!
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
NICE GIRLS FINISH FIRST
So one day I was thinking about today’s woman, as I often do, considering that I write funny books about the everyday (and not so everyday!) things we all go through, and I was wondering about that perpetual dilemma – the Myth of the Nice Girl.
Somehow, through a peculiar evolution of the professional environment, women today are finally recognized (mostly) as equally competent, ambitious, and dedicated as men in the workforce. (We’ll leave the “we have to work smarter and harder” argument aside for now.) But yet, we have an added burden: we have to be NICE.
Now, this isn’t really tough for most women, most of the time. We were raised to be nice. That’s what little girls do, right? “Play nice!” “Be nice!” Except, well, there are times when you can’t be all that nice . . . Boyfriend cheating? Kick him to the curb! Um, in a nice way? Opposing counsel trying underhanded tactics? Notify the judge and get him sanctioned! Er, nicely?
The idea of a character who is very ambitious and a great person, but a little bit of a tough chick on the surface, really intrigued me. And I had the perfect character in Kirby Green, newly-hired exec at the Whips and Lace Co. She’d pretty much stolen every scene she was in in AMERICAN IDLE (Double RITA finalist, how cool is that??). Then I wanted to compare and contrast Kirby with a character who was so nice that she was in danger of becoming a doormat. Brianna sprang to life. My good friend who is an opera singer (no, really!) provided some great background for her. Then I set the two of them loose to play on the pages – each helping the other learn something about life, and about herself. That’s how NICE GIRLS FINISH FIRST was born.
Can we be successful as women today and still retain some of that niceness that was so valued in earlier years? I think so. But nice doesn’t mean dumb, and today’s nice girls DO finish first. They might just have to kick a little ass along the way.
Nicely.
Thanks for helping me celebrate the release of my second novel!! – Alesia Holliday (p.s. This nice girl is frantically polishing some pages due to Hollywood interest – you can see the details at http://www.alesiaholliday.com/blog/)
Let's hear it for Aleisa Holliday! Tune in Sunday for my next blog. In the meantime be nice!
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
Sunday, July 10, 2005
A Bit On The Serious Side
Long Time No Blog. So sorry about that, things have been hectic and then some.
For those of you who are expecting a blog about the tour I’m afraid you’re going to have to wait another few days because this one’s going to be a bit more personal.
A while ago I wrote a blog called “Hating Gives You Wrinkles” in which I said I would never say anything negative about my ex out of respect for my son. Some things have happened recently that have lead me to believe that staying quiet about my experiences during my marriage isn’t helping anyone but instead perpetuating a problem. So I’m breaking the silence. During my marriage my husband was diagnosed as bipolar. He went on more than a few manic spending sprees, his mood was all over the place and at times his outbursts resulted in broken furniture and the like. He forged my name on several credit card applications and charged up tens of thousands of dollars of debt, he hurt himself and threatened suicide on a somewhat regular basis.
I’m writing this because I want people who are involved with a significant other who is either mentally ill or an addict to understand something. While I encourage you to try to get these people help I also strongly discourage you from martyring yourself on their behalf. It doesn’t help anyone. In fact it usually just enables the person in question thus making the whole situation worse. When it became clear to me that my husband was losing a battle to his own dark and unidentified demons I took him to a psychiatrist. I also dragged him to a marriage counselor. When he was diagnosed I told him I would forgive everything he had done in the past if he agreed to three conditions:
1) He had to come clean with me about all the things he had done up to that point in time.
2) He had to stop lying to me
3) He had to continue to take his medication and continue to see a psychiatrist.
He wasn’t able to do any of those things so I left. Things got very ugly for a while and at times downright scary (it was during this time that I started writing Sex, Murder And A Double Latte). While my friends and family all know the whole story I have made a point of not sharing any of it with the media or people that we knew that were more his friends than mine. Now he’s doing the same things he did to me to his (now ex) fiancée. He’s not an evil man but he needs help. Unfortunately you can’t force someone to get help. Many people have to hit rock bottom before they’re willing to accept their weaknesses and accept responsibility for their actions and their own well being. I know there are people who know my ex who would love to send him money to help him out of the latest mess he’s created for himself but I guarantee you that won’t help.
So here’s the moral of the story: If you are a mother, wife, husband, child or friend of a self destructive person understand that it is your responsibility to help them and sometimes helping them means walking away. Also keep in mind that you have a responsibility to yourself. Self-destructive people tend to blow up and everyone around them is hit by the shrapnel. Allowing someone else’s issues to destroy you doesn’t help anyone.
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
For those of you who are expecting a blog about the tour I’m afraid you’re going to have to wait another few days because this one’s going to be a bit more personal.
A while ago I wrote a blog called “Hating Gives You Wrinkles” in which I said I would never say anything negative about my ex out of respect for my son. Some things have happened recently that have lead me to believe that staying quiet about my experiences during my marriage isn’t helping anyone but instead perpetuating a problem. So I’m breaking the silence. During my marriage my husband was diagnosed as bipolar. He went on more than a few manic spending sprees, his mood was all over the place and at times his outbursts resulted in broken furniture and the like. He forged my name on several credit card applications and charged up tens of thousands of dollars of debt, he hurt himself and threatened suicide on a somewhat regular basis.
I’m writing this because I want people who are involved with a significant other who is either mentally ill or an addict to understand something. While I encourage you to try to get these people help I also strongly discourage you from martyring yourself on their behalf. It doesn’t help anyone. In fact it usually just enables the person in question thus making the whole situation worse. When it became clear to me that my husband was losing a battle to his own dark and unidentified demons I took him to a psychiatrist. I also dragged him to a marriage counselor. When he was diagnosed I told him I would forgive everything he had done in the past if he agreed to three conditions:
1) He had to come clean with me about all the things he had done up to that point in time.
2) He had to stop lying to me
3) He had to continue to take his medication and continue to see a psychiatrist.
He wasn’t able to do any of those things so I left. Things got very ugly for a while and at times downright scary (it was during this time that I started writing Sex, Murder And A Double Latte). While my friends and family all know the whole story I have made a point of not sharing any of it with the media or people that we knew that were more his friends than mine. Now he’s doing the same things he did to me to his (now ex) fiancée. He’s not an evil man but he needs help. Unfortunately you can’t force someone to get help. Many people have to hit rock bottom before they’re willing to accept their weaknesses and accept responsibility for their actions and their own well being. I know there are people who know my ex who would love to send him money to help him out of the latest mess he’s created for himself but I guarantee you that won’t help.
So here’s the moral of the story: If you are a mother, wife, husband, child or friend of a self destructive person understand that it is your responsibility to help them and sometimes helping them means walking away. Also keep in mind that you have a responsibility to yourself. Self-destructive people tend to blow up and everyone around them is hit by the shrapnel. Allowing someone else’s issues to destroy you doesn’t help anyone.
Kyra Davis
www.kyradavis.com
Sex, Murder And A Double Latte IN STORES NOW!!!
For The Love Of A Dog--A fun online read!
Moms Of Mystery--An e-newsletter!
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