Let me start off by apologizing in advance if this post is in anyway incoherent. You see I’m at the tale end of a day from hell. Like most hellish days it started early (as in way too early to get up) with a small earthquake. Being a California native I’m not entirely unaccustomed to such events. When tremors would wake me up as a kid I would groan and pray that the quake wouldn’t be strong enough to necessitate getting out of bed.
My attitude kind of changed in 1989 when in a 15 second span of time a portion of the Bay Bridge collapsed, downtown Santa Cruz was completely destroyed and a good portion of San Francisco’s Marina district burst into flames.
So while I still don’t stress about earthquakes I also no longer wait to see if they’re going to be big before getting out of bed. Of course the quake this morning ranked a puny 3.14 in magnitude and it lasted for all of four seconds or so. However it was monumental in that it was the first one I’ve felt since the birth of my child so this time when I woke up my first thought was, “Oh my God, I’ve got to get to my kid!” Again that didn’t turn out to be necessary but it still shook me up (no pun intended).
Then of course I couldn’t get back to sleep which was annoying since I’ve been up very late the last few nights writing. But I kept thinking to myself, “What if the quake had been bigger? Would my son have done what I taught him to do or would he have panicked? And all that furniture that I’ve fastened to the walls…is it really secure? Should I be e-mailing my unfinished manuscripts to out of state friends so that I’ll still have it in the event that my computer and my back-up disks get buried under a pile of rubble?” So in other words I was awake the rest of the night.
I staggered through the day only half conscious. My son on the other hand was a bundle of energy. This is a bad combination. Somewhere between trying to control him, getting errands done and trying to stay awake I lost my cell phone with all my friends and colleagues numbers in it not to mention a few addresses and my calendar. Then this guy, who I was supposed to go out with this weekend, called me up to chat. Now this man, who is probably very nice, has been irritating me a lot. It’s not exactly his fault. We’ve only met once (at the grocery store) but he knew about my book and was all excited about getting to know its author. After a few phone conversations it became clear that he has a lot of preconceived ideas about who I am and furthermore had all these romantic ideas of what our relationship was going to be. Keep in mind that we haven’t even been out on a date yet! Now normally I’m a really nice person and I know that guys risk a lot when they ask a woman out but this phone call caught me at a very bad moment. We were two seconds into our conversation when he started telling me how just talking to me makes him “giddy” and that I’m the “goddess of all things” at which point I just sort of snapped. So there will not be a date this weekend or ever with this particular person which is probably for the best. Again, I think he’s a good guy; he’s just not a good match for me. As far as I’m concerned the sexiest thing a man can do is give me space.
Anyway, it will be tomorrow in less than an hour and I’m going to just pretend that today never happened.
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